the addict’s rosary

There is no addict’s rosary, but praying the sorrowful mysteries often reminds me of powerlessness. One of the first things an addict in recovery does is admit powerlessness. I don’t like it any more now than I did when I first started recovery, but it’s necessary all the same. Without admitting powerlessness, I can’t getContinue reading “the addict’s rosary”

invitation from jesus

I run the prayer rope through my thumb and index finger on my right hand, which now has a blister on it from the many hundreds of knots I’ve slid through in the hour I’ve been praying. Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner. I feel guilty as sin aboutContinue reading “invitation from jesus”

a prayer of repentance, sort of: otherwise titled “fine, Jesus, I’ll do it.”

Me: Jesus, I’ve fucked up again as far as being angry about shit I can’t control and in so doing, gotten to where I don’t feel as close to you, and to where I’m tempted to relapse. The thing is, I know I need to repent and as far as confessing, that’s what I’m doingContinue reading “a prayer of repentance, sort of: otherwise titled “fine, Jesus, I’ll do it.””

my prayer practice

I have wanted to share what some of my prayer practice looks like just to throw some ideas out there for anyone who is interested. I recommend reading Prayer Spa: Ancient Treatments for the Modern Soul as a helpful resource for anyone wanting further ideas on prayer practices. It’s a very short resource with someContinue reading “my prayer practice”

prayer bead prayers for dealing with big feelings

Often I have huge feelings that I don’t know how to process appropriately, and I wrote these prayers for use on Anglican prayer beads. One thing about having multiple personalities is that someone always has some big feelings to process, and these are prayers whoever is present at the time can pray. Even the repetitionContinue reading “prayer bead prayers for dealing with big feelings”

baptismal promises and covenant – following jesus

Spiritual practice looks different for everyone as well all come to Jesus in different ways, and my relationship with Jesus has been complex. Part of my spiritual practice is to renew my baptismal vows regularly, a minimum of once a week, to keep them on my mind. They are a great guide for Christian life,Continue reading “baptismal promises and covenant – following jesus”

main prayer altar

I’ve been collecting things for a long time to work into my main area where I pray if I’m at home and I’m alone. I pray in the living room with the kids, this is when it’s just me and God. I’ve had many good moments here, and I’ve worked hard to get it howContinue reading “main prayer altar”

have mercy on me for i am in need

This is another of the prayers that I have written during my recovery, when I realized that I am in need of sobriety but cannot achieve it because I sure as hell spent a good portion of my life trying. I’ve been an addict since I was a child, after all, and I had gottenContinue reading “have mercy on me for i am in need”

step six prayers

As I work through the 12 steps, I’ve been writing prayers for many of them. Here are two prayers I wrote during step 6. Amendment of Life God, I want to recover from my addiction and all the shitty things that I do to myself and to others as part of it. I want youContinue reading “step six prayers”