grieving eucharist, loving jesus

Disclaimer: Feelings are feelings, it doesn’t mean that they are reality, and I want to say that up front as I talk about deep grief, I experienced throughout the height of the COVID-19 pandemic and the feeling that I had been abandoned by the Church. It’s a story of the deep grief and the lossContinue reading “grieving eucharist, loving jesus”

baptismal promises and covenant – following jesus

Spiritual practice looks different for everyone as well all come to Jesus in different ways, and my relationship with Jesus has been complex. Part of my spiritual practice is to renew my baptismal vows regularly, a minimum of once a week, to keep them on my mind. They are a great guide for Christian life,Continue reading “baptismal promises and covenant – following jesus”

main prayer altar

I’ve been collecting things for a long time to work into my main area where I pray if I’m at home and I’m alone. I pray in the living room with the kids, this is when it’s just me and God. I’ve had many good moments here, and I’ve worked hard to get it howContinue reading “main prayer altar”

thy kingdom come

My Father, who art in heavenI’m still scared of the idea of you as father Hallowed be thy nameLet all I do be done for youAnd for your son, Jesusand the sacrifice of his precious bloodand for the Holy Spiritwho resides within me Thy kingdom comethine, not minethy will be donethine, not mine On earthwhereContinue reading “thy kingdom come”

baptismal promises and covenant – renunciation

Part of my personal spiritual practice is to renew my baptismal vows regularly. Every time I do this, something new jumps out at me and for a while I was concerned and thought did I lie when I took these promises at baptism, at confirmation, at reaffirmation? I don’t think I lied at all, lookingContinue reading “baptismal promises and covenant – renunciation”

have mercy on me for i am in need

This is another of the prayers that I have written during my recovery, when I realized that I am in need of sobriety but cannot achieve it because I sure as hell spent a good portion of my life trying. I’ve been an addict since I was a child, after all, and I had gottenContinue reading “have mercy on me for i am in need”

prayer bead prayers to recognize we are beloved of god

I used to be unable to believe that God loved me. I didn’t even love myself. I still don’t love myself. My problem isn’t that I don’t love my neighbor as myself, it’s that I don’t even love myself. I often don’t believe other people love me, either. These are prayers I wrote to beContinue reading “prayer bead prayers to recognize we are beloved of god”

step six prayers

As I work through the 12 steps, I’ve been writing prayers for many of them. Here are two prayers I wrote during step 6. Amendment of Life God, I want to recover from my addiction and all the shitty things that I do to myself and to others as part of it. I want youContinue reading “step six prayers”

praying the glorious mysteries with my kids

I hope you remember the hilarious article in which I told you all about praying the rosary with my kids. At least tonight, now that they are used to it a little more, there was no giggling and inquiring about vaginas from my adolescent son. We have gotten into more of a rhythm now, althoughContinue reading “praying the glorious mysteries with my kids”